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| | Good Choices: Discernment Leads To Integrity
Copyright
Mellissa Laurie Seaman 2003 All Rights Reserved
We make judgments about people all
the time, and they are usually not helpful. “That jerk just cut me off on
the freeway!” “That girl is rude.” “That guy is an ignorant fool.” We make
our judgments based on rudimentary perceptions and limited experience.
Life experience has taught many of us to be careful about making
judgments. We have learned, usually the hard way, that making judgments
and having expectations usually leads to disappointment at best. Our
judgments close our hearts, and our expectations put limitations on an
otherwise limitless future.
But sometimes you Know that something, or someone, is not good for you.
Your gut tells you. Your instincts tell you. Your angels whisper in your
ear. You can feel it in your heart that this thing, this situation, this
relationship – is not right for you. Should you toss away this feeling,
this Knowing, because it is a “judgment?” Should you feel guilt for having
such seemingly judgmental feelings? No. To do so would be to ignore your
powers of Discernment, and to make meaningless the Gift of Free Choice.
Discernment is a skill of Wisdom. To discern the Truth from the Lie, the
Right from the Wrong, the Good from the Bad – this, if it is not done from
a place of fear, is discernment. Fear is the underpinning of Judgment, as
it is the underpinning of all Separation. Discernment is a gift that goes
along with the Free Choice we all have. We get to decide what is right for
us.
Discernment is how we shape our adult values. As children, we are fed
whatever values our parents held. As grown-ups, we discern what is Truth
for us, and we create our own values. I make my decisions based on my
values. I value health, joy, free creativity, faith and love. So I make
decisions based on this. And when I encounter people who choose illness,
complaining, victimhood, pessimism and fear, I stay away from them. Does
this make me judgmental? No. I’m using my discernment to see what is Right
for me. Does that mean I hate this person? No. In fact, if I’m in touch
with my True Self, I love this person. I just don’t want to be involved in
their drama. I wish only for them what is in their Highest Good – whatever
that may be. And I accept that it may be in that person’s Highest Good to
stay in pain for a while to learn some lesson. I think the AA term for it
is that they are “doing their research.” But that doesn’t need to include
me. I am detached, although I am never completely separated, as we all
share the same web.
Freedom vs. Interconnectedness
We are all One. That seems to be an acceptable statement for most people
who are reading this. We are all part of the great Oneness. We are
interconnected in myriad of ways that we can scarcely understand. We are
all God/Goddess/Divine – especially when we are combined.
We are all parts, reflections, pieces of the grand puzzle. But it is the
puzzle that is perfect and whole, not the parts. The entire Earth, with
her sufferings and her triumphs is perfect in its purpose, not in its
details. Would you look at a murder scene and say “Ah – now this is
divine.” Probably not. But would the mother of the murder victim look at
her next newborn baby and see even more beauty in the infant? Perhaps. And
if you take all the murders and the deaths and the births and the rebirths
and join them all – perhaps that would be the perfection – the Great
Wisdom of birth and death revealed.
As pieces of the great puzzle, every action a single person takes affects
the whole. We each have freedom to do as we choose. Some take action with
no regard to the whole, or even to the other people around them. Some act
only in their own regard. There are always effects, whether they are
intended or not. We are so interconnected.
Those who are conscious of this interconnectedness, who value the
enjoyment of life for all, generally try to make decisions that will
benefit the Whole. Those who live in fear generally couldn’t care less
about interconnectedness, because they’re mostly reacting defensively to
their life, and clinging to their perception of independence and
separation. But there is no separation. We are all one. And the one
affects the whole. Our Freedom is seen by some as an invective to act in a
singular way, separated from the greater web. On the surface, it looks
like we are freeing ourselves, by releasing ourselves from those weighty
connections to the All That Is – allowing ourselves free reign to do what
we think will give us pleasure and insight. But the separation usually
brings us back to a feeling of emptiness, cut off from the web and the
connections.
Integrity
Walking the path with Good Intent for All That Is is the path of
Integrity. It brings peace not only to the walker, but to all that
surrounds her. It is not the requirement of a religion. It is not the
dogma taught as to a child. It is not a restriction on freedom. It is
simply the strong recommendation of a Universe that cares about each
insignificant human light that walks the Earth and elsewhere. Discernment
is the proper use of Freedom to Choose actions that benefit All That Is.
This is the substance of Integrity - our birthright, our privilege, and
our joy.
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Mellissa Seaman is a co-founder
of San Diego Circle
and founder of Heart
Wisdom. She provides profound energetic healing sessions, teaches
workshops, leads rituals, and writes articles on spiritual awakening, healing,
and sacred living. Reach Mellissa at info@heartwisdom.net.
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